Saturday, January 8, 2011

Forbidden Love

Ok, so last year for LA we were suppose to write a short story. Now, it had been a REALLY long time since I had written a story. And I was never really good at it! I put alot of time into this one though, but it still sucked. I think this was the original thing that got me writing though... (wait, I just noticed like every single post starts with 'ok'. Note to self, change that) So, here it is. Feel free to laugh at will. I didn't know sometime like this could ever come out of MY head....

     My palms were sweating as I looked down the dark alley. Even thought we had been meeting for over three fortnights, I was still anxious that someone was going to discover us.
     "Love isn't forbidden," Eliza whispered into my ear. Pondering this, I replied "Is is right for a mule to love a horse? Is it socially correct for a serf to fall for a princess?"
     "Your worth just as much as I am, and I know you're aware of that!" she answered hastily. A sudden noise alerted both of our senses. Just rats, I assured myself. Looking into my eyes, Eliza placed her well-kept hand upon the David's star sewn to my vest. In return I placed my on the absence of one on her cloak.
     "I would rather die than live the rest of my life without you," I murmured, running my hand over her fragile face.
     "Then tell my father! His best interests are in whom I marry!" she debated passionately.
     "Quietly now, you must leave. It is dangerous for a young woman to wander this long after dark." She hesitated, and then wordlessly she turned and began walking away from me. I sighed, letting some distance gather between us before I left the dingy hideaway. The streets were deserted except for one homeless soul, huddled in a Russian flag for warmth. The disrespect for this country was unbearable ever since the Port Arther was destroyed in the war. Now the prices of food and necessities are so great that hunger and homelessness has spread through the city. The effect it had on my own self were so great I am being forced to work 12-hour shifts to remain alive. When I returned to my sleeping quarters above an old barn, I was aware of someone in my presence. Turning, I came into eye contact with another stable boy, watching my every move. Ignoring the uncomfortable feeling, I found space on the other side of the room and rested.
     Drenched in cold well water, I arose out of a deep sleep. Aware that this meant I had slept past my shift, I hurriedly jumped into salute and rambled off my apologies. My mast curtly grasped my ear and yanked me down the steps and into a dirty stall in the stable.
     "You know the rules perfectly well, boy, and that is that stable workers are not allowed to leave my property without permission, especially  after curfew! I knew it was unacceptable to take in an orphan, let alone a Jew. Don't you dare interrupt me! From now on you will be working a double shift and be required an escort. Understand?" Wiping the spit off my face I feebly nodded. On that note, he pivoted around and briskly walked out of the stable. I took a deep breath and ignored the sinking feeling in my stomach. No more Eliza. I promised myself we could still make it happen. But for now I had a shift to work.
     An immense pain shot through my spine as I attempted to lift yet another pail of manure. From working double shifts for a week, my body was aching. I looked over at my supervisor. His sleek, business man like appearance was incomparable to my grimy, manure covered clothes. It was obvious which one a woman would choose if she had the opportunity. Refocusing my mind, I tried to lift the bucket again.
     The brakes of a car distracted me from my work later that morning. Curiously, I watched an expensive car park and the doors open. Out of it stepped a man dressed in an exorbitant suit. Turning around, he reached inside the car and grasped an extended hand. He effortlessly assisted a beautiful woman out of the vehicle, and immediately grabbed her waist. With a jolt of recognition, I realized that the figure was familiar. Without thinking, I ran to the nearest bush in a crouch, trying to examine the girl more closely. As if on cue, she glanced over to the shrub I had chosen to hide behind and we lock into eye contact. Eliza's look was one of anguish, and as I looked more closely, I could tell the man at her side was not her doings. I became conscious that she was mouthing words at me. Now. Soon. Please.She glanced over at the man at her side, since he had noticed her wandering eyes and was trying to lead her into a building. Without looking back at me she obediently followed, like a slave would his master.
      I sat there planning what to do when she returned from inside the building. I was determined to sit there for hours upon hours just to come into contact with her again. The sidewalk was thick with traffic as I tried to keep a steady eye on the door. Startled, I realized that Eliza had already exited the building and was heading back towards the car. Quickly I rose from my hiding spot and sprinted to the edge of the road.
     "Madam, are you interested in buying a train ticket for Tynda? It leaves at 7:30pm at the Kingsford train station," I stared into her eyes, willing her to understand the logic.
     "Sir, I would love to help you out, but I have no reason to go to Tynda, Thank-you for offering." The flicker in her eyes informed me she had understood. To keep in character, I jogged toward the next street wanderer without a backwards glance. When I was positive that I was out of view I trotted happily back to my work area before my absence would be noticed.
     "It needs to be done, Eliza, I cannot think of anything else to do." I regretfully watched the tears stream down her face. I attempted to look her in the eye, but she turned away.
     "I shall not leave my father. I refuse to end up like my mother. Anyway, I am sure he would have some way of finding me." She stated, looking downward so I could not see her face. Feeling pained, I replied "You will be leaving your father in a few months time to get married. Why should it not be me?"
     "My father..."
     "Your father nothing. It is your life, not his. Now, there are 20 minutes before the train leaves and it is your decision whether you want to be on it or not." Taking a deep breath, I could see she was making a decision.
     "Yes." The word that rolled off her tongue was so exquisite that I could almost hear my heart singing. It must of showed on my face because she released a massive smile. I quickly discussed with her my plan to move from city to city until I found a steady job. As I reached for my small bundle of possessions I felt a pang of remorse because Eliza only had the clothes on her back. As I told her this, she beamed and revealed a small purse of gold coins as well as an expensive wristwatch. I sensed my spirits lift as I realized what she would have had to do to obtain the small gift.
     "Thank you," I mumbled, but she just shrugged it off.
     "Wait," she indicated as she opened her pocket. Out emerged a seam ripper, and with a gleam in her eye, she started splitting seams from my vest.
     Holding the David's star in my hand, I questioned, "Does that mean we are equal now"
     "We always have been," she replied as she grasped my hand and led me to the train station.

THE END!!!

Pretty cheesy, and I was truly, actually surprised when I got it back WITH A BIG FAT ONE HUNDRED PERCENT!!! Yeah, well, I could say a lot about that teacher to, but I haven't yet decided if I want to announce that...  She graduated with my brother. Like the same grade and everything. I didn't figure it out into at least halfway through the second year, and then somebody told her that and of course she was interested. He had a LOT to say about her, that's for sure. Quote "On the beauty vs brains spectrum, she CLEARLY went one way" ahhh I love my brother. Anyway, how did I get on that topic?? OH RIGHT my story -_- I thought it was really bad but know reading it over it's somewhat decent. The plot is quite weak, but the writing levels good. Quote ms. noname, its "waaaay above grade 8 level." Of course, I was a bitch at that time in my life, and didn't believe a single word that came out of her mouth, but I realize know that was probably a complement =P . Anyway I got into a really big "disagreement" with her (wow I totally had a blonde moment I was like how to I type the quotation marks you do with your fingers... OH WAIT!) Anyway, as most of my friends know I can go on all day about HER. But I better sign off because my eye are barely open. For now and ever ~Jen

1 comment:

Grumpy Old Ken said...

Well done,keep writing, you deserve an audience.

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